Assignments up to my ears!! And music into my ears..

*stumbles in*

FINALLY!!!! Time to blog! Sheesh, haven't been here in ages..
But this is only because of the fact that I have been swimming in an un-ending ocean of assignments and have now only reduced that ocean to a puddle. This makes me VERY happy!

I'm needing some TLC today though. The weekend that I was going to spend with my boyfriend has been cancelled and I will not be seeing him for 4 weeks so bare with me if this post gets slightly soppy.

So, today it was Skillet that was guiding me through all of my work and I listened to a song that I haven't heard in a while which is called Those Nights. Skillet is so awesome because and I don't know why. I think it's that "it factor" that all the painful talent shows talk about. And the lead singer's voice. And the instrumentals. And the words of the songs. A combo of all of these things is really unlikely in most bands etc. and I don't know why. Skillet, however, pulls everything off with such awesomeness, you can't help but LURV them!! Anyway, give this song a listen and then look for some of their other stuff of the Tube that is You 'cause they can make some really great tunes. Even if you think they are emo-gross-cry-baby-prepubescent losers, just try it. PLEEEEASE. If you don't have at least one of their songs stuck in your head afterwards then you may send me hate mail.

I give you...le awesome song!

Not a very epic video, but Skillet doesn't look like they're very active on their VEVO channel.

Oh and for those of you with StumbleUpon, well done!! And for those of you that don't....DO IT!!! DO IT NOW!!! It's a fat time consumer and will assist you in any issues of procrastination that you might be lacking in so beware. But it's such a beauty. You find the most amazing things.

Like this: Men Who Make Houses Explode.

They take wood panels from the house itself and rip them out, saw them up or glue them together and then they nail them back onto the house in these forms. So COOL!!


I think that this one of my favourite, but the next one is the most intense one, I think.

And this vortex looking thing goes straight through to the other side. Sadly 2 of the structures have been knocked down as they were earmarked for development, even before the artists got hold of them.


And there is so much more that you find. StumbleUpon takes you all over the web and back. Just type in your interests, click "Stumble" and away you go.

Weather has been so crappy today, I decided to stay in and do work at the expense of my lectures, but I don't care at this point in time 'casue I pretty much despise the lecturer and I don't like the other subject, partly due to the lecturer as well. Let us not go into that because there is really no need for me to injure my keyboard right now.

OH!! BREAKING NEWS!! BEER IS BETTER FOR YOUR LIVER THAN WHAT COFFEE IS!!
We knew a family and the husband was an alcoholic and I never saw him sober once in my entire life. He had a heart attack in April and passed away sadly, but we only learnt of it yesterday. They had to do an autopsy to verify the cause of death because of the fact that he was an alcoholic. His liver was in perfect condition, albeit a little aged, because he drank beer and beer alone. The family was uber-shocked and the doctors then told them about the fact that beer doesn't damage your liver. I'm assuming it's because there is a LOT of water involved in the process of making beer and because it's made from natural ingredients such as barley and hops. Who knows..

Think I might actually write an article on that for the student newspaper.

Peace kids!! Must work now :)

back and.....FIRE!!!

So vac ended today (if you want to call what was really a glorified long weekend a vac).

Sad face.

But I had a really great time at home and also with the male counterpart in PE last weekend. Wow, feels weird to type again.

So I have this irrational fear of res burning down during vac and all my possessions (the ones I didn't take home with me) along with it. And today that almost became a reality.

As we were driving into town we saw a LOT of smoke coming from the mountain (also, glorified mound)behind our res.
Then we drive up the street and see that oh, hello, the fire is on the side of the mountain facing our res and Joe Slovo (our neighbours).
Lots of wind, lots of smoke, lots of flames.
The res filled up with smoke and then the fire alarm went off and people who were far too excited started yelling, "It's not a fire drill!! GET OUT!!!"
And we're like, really, do you think we don't know that seeing as how I can't see your face because of the smoke in this building. Seriously.

So eventually (after an hour and the fire brigade FINALLY making an appearance) they manage to get the fire out/under control and we are allowed back into res. Only now the entire place stinks like charred meat and dead, burnt grass and that black stuff is everywhere.
Welcome back guys. Here's a fire for you.

And now I have another song for you: Caroline - David Gray.
I seem to have this weird relationship with Mr Gray in that I go through a period where he is all I listen to and then I forget he even exists for months at a time. And then it starts all over again.
I can't find a legit music video for it but this one that I found is pretty cool. Got the little music bar things i Like to chase with my pen sometimes.

It's so cool how the combo of the electro-ness and the acoustic guitar work together.
Love it or hate it, you have to respect it.
And this term will prove miraculous if I make it out with my sanity. The amount of work I have - cringe.
Don't be expecting to hear too much from my side. :/ :(

Peace kids. :)

Some thing is going down here...

...this is turning into a music blog. Not like I'm complaining, but it is just occurring in front of my eyes and it seems as if there is nothing I can do about it.. Shriek!! Do not want to become monotonous (in style, not music taste). So anyway, this song is from a not-so-amazing band in my opinion, but they do have a few songs that absolutely blow my hair back, such as this one. It is amazing. And reminds me of my amazing boyfriend. Feast your ears on this..
WARNING: IT MAY BECOME SOPPY IF YOU ARE A HARDCORE, NARLY PERSON WHO THINKS THAT LOVE IS STUPID AND THAT YOU NEED NOBODY EXCEPT YOURSELF IN THIS WHOLE WORLD. IF YOU ARE SAD LIKE THAT, IGNORE THIS POST.

I'm missing you so much, I'll see you die tonight
Just so I can get to you before the sun will rise
I know the signs are on and I feel this too
None of that ever seems to matter when I'm holding you

And I'm wasting away, away from you

What have I gotten into this time around
I know that I had sworn I'd never trust anyone again but I didn't have to

You had me at hello.

I've never seen a smile that can light the room like yours
It's simply radiant, I feel more with everyday that goes by
I watch the clock to make my timing just right

Would it be okay?
Would it be okay if I took your breath away?

And I'm wasting away, away from you.

What have I gotten into this time around
I know that I had sworn I'd never trust anyone again but I didn't have to
You had me at hello

You gave me butterflies at the mailbox (you had me at hello)
You gave me butterflies at the mailbox (you had me at hello)
You gave me butterflies at the mailbox (you had me at hello)
You gave me butterflies at the mailbox (you had me at hello)

You gave me butterflies (you are so cute)
at the mailbox (you had me at hello)
[x4]

What have I gotten into this time around
I know that I had sworn I'd never trust anyone again but I didn't have to
You had me at hello
You had me at hello
You had me at hello

How gorgeous?? And now, look for Have Faith In Me by the same band.(COPY AND PASTE ABOVE WARNING)

Peace :) xx

john mayer groupie for life!!

Not only is he visually stimulating for most (personally I don't think he's all that marvellous), but he has an AMAZING voice. Typing out an essay this morning and this song starts playing and I stop and listen for the full 5 minutes of his personal outpouring of emotions (which I think is really brave for anyone to do) and for the first time listened to all the words..and HAD to share them with someone.

Such a beautiful song!!

Had a nightmare that I couldn't get to Jarrod this weekend.. Zombies were involved. Speaking of, this week is Humans vs Zombies tag at Rhodes, but I will post more about that and my bizarre dreams when this murderous essay is done.

Peace :)

i love the smell of it...

It's Spring!! I love this season partly because of the fact that it's a happy medium. Being the winter child that I am, I can't do the depressing weather story for longer than is good for my mental health. Cuddling, fireplaces and reading can only continue for so long.
The the flowers come out - yay! - and then everything smells amazing and the sun shines softly and the world just looks like such a pretty place to be. You want to go outside barefoot and bush dive (Rhodents do this a lot - we kinda just dive straight into them [slightly inebriated, of course] and pray for the lack of thorns) and spend the day reading and tanning in the sun. We did this last week Monday. Kinda just took the day off and basked in all the glory of the majestic sunshine and became browner than before and went back to res a lot sleepier than before.. Was such a beautiful day!
Yesterday, our residence (which is soon to be named Rosa Parks house) had our Spring Day Fun Day. All the usual: apple bobbing, 3-legged races, sack races, egg spoon races, water-balloons by the ton and blind man's bluff. I was the one in our group who had to do the apple bobbing because I was the only one who hadn't just had their hair relaxed or had a weave. So I had to shove my face into a bowl of warm, still runny jelly and get the 3 apples in it, out and then run to my team mate who was waiting with a plate to receive my apples. Tons of fun, but my face didn't like it too much. Had such fun. Our entertainment rep who organised the day wanted to know why we must always be so politically correct, but in her rush, she instead asked us why we had to be so "politically ERECT". Entertainment rep indeed. :)

So this week is the last one of term and then we have a ridiculously short holiday of 10 or 11 days and then it's back to the grindstone - seriously!! I have 7 major things due in the first 3 weeks of being back as well as our Hall Ball and in order to complete one of those things I need to read a book. The 14th of October might not survive what I'm going to do once I hand in my last task. It really might not. And then it will be onto studying for exams like a mental person. Sheesh.... This is me, not thinking about it..

Just thought I'd share a song with you.. Think it's such a sexy song, however corny it may be, it still rocks. And I think Rob Thomas has definitely become nicer over age, like red wine or whatever it is.

It's quite old, but don't judge mkaay?? We all have random, old songs that we secretly dance in our underwear to.. At least I hope that we all do, otherwise I'm alone in the gyrating in your underwear phenomenon.

And let me also just point out how amazing Riverdance music is?? (can you tell that my media player is on shuffle?) Especially Reel Around the Sun, with the noise of the tap-dancers' feet in the background.

Ok, so I am going to allow myself a little bit of venting space here, forgive me. Telkom is the absolute worst service provider in the history of service providers!! Haven't been able to Skype my boyfriend since Friday afternoon which is terrible because we usually Skype twice a day and by the time the phone lines began working again today, I had started suffering from withdrawal symptoms!! Missed his face so much, but this weekend I will be back with him again and happier than a kid at Christmas.

For now though I must go and work my fingers off again and recover from this weekend..
Peace...

a beautiful song, deadlines and cheers to a long weekend

So my friend Tiff whom I have spoken about before (the crazy Zimbo with the red hair?) is the biggest fan of me and Jarrod. She thinks that we are the cutest couple and are meant for each other blah blah (which we are, but she REALLY believes it too). So she told me to download and listen to this song: Here by Rascal Flats. Watch and learn. And listen, because the lyrics alone don't do it enough justice. It's one of those whiny country songs but the way it's sung is just so fitting to the words. Such an awesome song and so true for both me and the man.

There's a place I've been looking forThat took me in and out of buildingsBehind windows, walls and doorsAnd I thought I found itCouple times, even settled downAnd I'd hang around just long enoughTo find my way back outI know now the place that I was trying toReachWas you, right here in front of me 

[CHORUS]And I wouldn't change a thingI'd walk right back through the rainBack to every broken heartOn the day that it was breakin'And I'd relive all the yearsAnd be thankful for the tearsI've cried with every stumbled stepThat led to you and got me here, right here 

It's amazing what I let my heart go throughTo get me where it got meIn this moment here with youAnd it passed me byGod knows how many timesI was so caught up in holdingWhat I never thought I'd findI know now, there's a million roadsI had to takeTo get me in your arms that way 

[Repeat Chorus]
In a love I never thought I'd get to get to-hereAnd if that's the roadGod made me take to be with you 

[Repeat Chorus]
And I'd relive all the yearsAnd be thankful for all the tearsI've cried with every stumbled stepThat led to you and got me here, right hereOh, baby-OooOh, got me here 

Terribly sorry if that isn't your kind of song but I think it's pretty rad.


So, for the first time tonight I finished an article for the newspaper with 20 minutes to go until the deadline. I was given an article to write which was a pretty simple one but was kinda stupid. It was about the most datable (as in the person you'd want to go on a date with) SRC candidate. It's campaign week for them so they wanted something different on the SRC candidates and not the boring old stuff about them. I thought it was pretty lame and was told about it on Tuesday night. When I asked people who they thought was the most datable candidate, they thought it was pretty lame too. Anyway, I saw my sub-editor at 4 o'clock just before my hour long journalism tutorial (which would mean I'd come out at 5) and she said that I have until 5 to slap something together. Hello? Ja, I'll just do it now in my tut because I have nothing better to do with my time at this moment of my life. This is after I had told her that it was lame and I wasn't gonna do it because of the danger of dragging my name through the S*&% by writing something so silly. Anyway, I got an e-mail later asking how far I was. This was at 19:35. I typed up an article (a good one, considering the topic) and bombed it off to her at 19:59. Yes. You may applaud me now. Felt quite proud :) Another byline for my portfolio and in the space of 20 minutes! Think I may just have proved my little theory that I do work best under pressure.


AND, tomorrow, I don't have a psychology tutorial (which is usually my only thing on a Friday) so my weekend started today (YAY) with my friend and I sitting in my room Facebook stalking someone with exclaims from her about how hot he is. And then she Fraped me. If you don't know what that is, Google it. AAAH!! Sorry, I've just told you what I hate hearing and want to beat up whoever says that to me when I ask them something.


Off to enjoy my weekend!! Going to be slightly insane! Wish it could be with my loved one though. Sad. Miss him.


Peace :)

purple fever, hell week v1.0 and v2.0 and the beginning of the countdown

Well, what was possibly one of the biggest parties of the year is over and I flaked out early due to the evil of crackling.

THIS STUFF IS EVIL!! DO NOT EVER TOUCH IT!! NOT UNLESS YOU WANT TO FEEL LIKE YOU ARE DYING (which i hope none of you ever do)

Soooo, the biggest party I mentioned before?? Tri-varsity. Which is still a bit of an enigma to me because of the following story:

I have been drinking crackling all year. It's terrible but it does the job and its cheap. I've survived, especially when mixed with Sprite. Once I had heartburn for 2 days after a large dose of Uncle Crackles here, but that didn't stop me from deciding to share a bomb (1.5 litre) with my friend mixed with Sprite for pre-drinks the first night of tri-var. We had the little pre-party in my room (matchbox) and then went to a friends res to finish it up and head out. There I finished up my half of the poison and had a few gulps of my boyfriend's vanilla vodka and coke. Then we headed out. Got to Friars and I'm ready for all the party that tri-var can bring my way. And then Uncle Crackles decides to ruin it all and saying something stupid like "I'm coming up!! And I'm bringing the supper you just had with me!!"

So that was me and the boyfriend coming back up to res to get me into bed at.................10 FRIKKEN 30 ON THE FRIDAY NIGHT OF THE BIGGEST MOST CRAZY WEEKEND OF THE YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And of course the next day I was man down until after lunch. Then the photos came out on Facebook and for once I was dreading them because I wasn't in any of them. I had completely failed and was so bummed that I had missed out on all the fun. The photos were so funny but I missed most of it.. The pre-party was great though. So the night ended up with my amazing boyfriend holding my hair back while I made best friends with Mr Shanks. Fail. And I failed his tri-var too although he keeps saying he came for me, not tri-var. Still feel like an ape. Trust my system to wait until tri-var to refuse poor old Uncle Crackles. That relationship has come to a bitter end and never will I ever have a crackling hangover again. Bad.life.choice. They aren't normal!! Recession wines and me are going to be good mates from now on.

me and the handsome man at pre-drinks (this is me sober and
still friends with uncle crackles)

Then the week after tri-var (last week) was Hell Week. With the profs making everything due for that week and the recovery time needed from the weekend, work piled up for everyone from all corners and threatened our very existence!!!......ok it wasn't THAT bad, but it wasn't pretty. It is now over but people are still drowning and my friend was telling me how she saw someone in the library who was only getting the readings she needed for her 10 page essay at 9:30 this morning and the deadline was at 10:00. Jaaaaaaa. Late for her.

I've only just managed to get the purple dye ff my chest which my boyfriend so lovingly dumped there for me :) Haven't seen the charming young man in a week now and I still have 3 weeks to go until I do. This will be the longest time that we haven't seen each other so I'm cringing at the though of that but we will get through it :) duh!

Oh, he wrote on my overalls for me. Little sign that says "Private Property" with his signature and little smiley face that he draws which looks like this: (marvel at my paint skills!!)

This was written on my bum in the middle between the 2 hand prints :P


Was so good to go home this past weekend though. Had a huge braai and ate tons of identifiable meat and potato bake (i make the best) and my mom's salad. No salad will ever beat that. 3 weeks until Jarrod, food, home and rest!! Can't wait :)

Peace :)

Substance..the gooey, icky type..

What matters to you?

How often do you ask yourself that?

How well do you answer that everytime you ask it?

If you're giving a list as long as your arm full of things then you could be really, really blessed and what not, or you're placing value on things that shouldn't be value laden.

Eek!! Why, oh, why, do I always get like this after saying goodbye to my boyfriend at yet another busstop, gate or next to an open door of a car that I am about to get into or walk away from? Wait, stupid question, huh?

Truth is, he matters a #$&%LOAD to me! He does, my family does, my friends do, my education does (which I am clinging onto for dear life at the moment). Memories matter to me because sometimes they are the only things that we have when all is said and done. Laughing matters.. But I think that comes standard with the above mentioned, especially with the crazy, amazing bunch I have been granted.

You know that moment when you realise how lucky you are to

1. be alive,
2. live (yes, they differ because this one is up to you to ensure),
3. have people in your life to be thankful for,
4. be in an amazing place (often self-determined),
5. and to realise that you are not, as you thought, in such a bad way?

Frikken glorious moment, isn't it?? I've lost count of how many times I've had that moment this year and I probably won't stop having it until I find a reason not to, which I hope will never happen (the guy told me he's here to stay, so..?..[hehe]). Everytime I've felt like caving and giving in this year and going home to my mommy and her amazing food and my glorious bed and and and....OK, now I miss home. Crap. Anyway, everytime I've done that, I've reminded myself of how lucky I am to be in a place like this one and have the people in my life that I do and what I can accomplish with what has been made available to me. The opportunities are FRIKKEN ENDLESS!! It's so exciting and if half the people around me here who moan about what's so wrong in their lives would open their eyes, smell the roses and see the silver lining, they would realise that too.

Ok, so I've harped on enough about this, but have been thinking about it for a while. On the Saturday before term started, my boyfriend's sister, Tam, had her wedding which was pretty much the most awesome one I've been too. Was small, really beautiful and Tam. of course, looked like a million bucks.
She loves the wholes '20's style and listens to people like Frank Sinetra and I can't recall who else. Oh, add Bowling for Soup to the mix. Yes, add it. Her dress was so pretty and I think outting up photos will do it a lot more justice.

Tam and her dad walking down the aisle

THE CAKE!!which was transported in
400 pieces from PE to East London

first dance...



Tam and her FRIKKEN CUTE brother :D



Tam and Cameron

Cocktails!!

Happiness is...

That's how we roll :)

Jarrod and his mom

The best for last..*sigh*

So yes, it was a great night! And come on, how handsome is the best man???? Riiiight?? ;)

On a sad note, I realise that I didn't mention that we had to put Monty down on my last day of being at home, literally, hours before I left :(. Was very sad, but we discovered that he had lymphatic cancer and the meds and the strain just got too much for hima dn the night before I left, he just looked like the life had been sucked right out of him and we could tell he was suffering and that it would be better that way. His body had swollen up randomly in places and he wouldn't stop shaking. So we sent him to doggy heaven. My mom has a quote on her Skype page that says "No matter how little money and how few possessions you own, having a dog makes you rich". This is so true. Louis Sabim was a smart man..

Eek, must get going though.. Class tomorrow. And a test!! Blegh..

Peace :)

Week nombre uno..

So, we've been at it for a week now. At what, I'm not too sure. Some of us have been at Friars and the Rat and others at lectures and the library and all the goody-two-shoes shit that must be done at some point. It was an interesting week with a lots of ups and a few downs, but it really is good to be back. If you had told me this 2 weeks ago, I would've told you to stop BS'ing me.

So on Friday night we went to De Beers (our brother res) for pre-drinks and started playing "Never ever have I ever..." For anyone who has ever played that game you will know that you learn a LOT about the people in the room with you. For those unfortunate few of you who have never played it, you go around the room saying "Never ever have I ever..." and then you say something after that, whether or not you have done it before. For example, "Never ever have I ever been skinny dipping" and the people who have been skinny dipping before have to take a sip of their drink. PLAY THIS GAME. It can get you pretty drunk pretty fast if you've done a lot of arb stuff though.
Anyhow, it was probably the nicest pre-drinks this year as there were about 10 or more of us squeezed into a little res room (not as small as ours, but decently small). We got told to shut up a few times but it was a good night all round apart from some guy in Friars trying to punch me because I elbowed him in the gut after he trampled my toes and pushed me into someone. He swore at me, I swore at him and then he raised his hand, at which point I pushed him again and told him what an asshole he was and walked away. Needless to say he was very drunk.

Then on Saturday morning a few friends and I went down to the soccer field on campus to paint our overalls. We take plain white overalls and go nuts on them with purple paint and then wear them for inter varsity (this is the PC term as it is between 4 universities now, but we all still call it Tri-Var). They get very dirty and very purple. Lots of purple paint being thrown around at the tri-var parties and they can get pretty out of hand so do not hope to keep them clean. And washing them is a sin. End of story. Your overalls will be siff and gross but you will learn to accept this.
So we spent the better part of Saturday afternoon on a sunny patch of grass with a bunch of other people getting covered in paint and jazzing up our overalls. Mine aren't doe yet but I will endeavour to get a picture up when they are done (I don't have a camera which is what I mean by endeavour). My legs hate me now though as we had to stand over our overalls and bend down to paint as the grass was wet and muddy and rolling around on it wasn't the greatest of ideas. The muscles in my leg want to boycott my body right now from all the stretching and bending.

And then on Sunday, 2 of my friends and I went to a naked photoshoot called the "My Body, My Choice" photoshoot. The deal is that you get naked with a message either written on your body or on a placard that you can use to hide a few, uh, distinguishing features as well as portray your message. As long as you bare a decent proportion of your bod and your photo has a message, you're good. It was done in protest of the fact that women are often pushed into boxes by today's society with regards to their bodies and that certain men objectify women according to what they look like. It was real art in motion and some of the photos that were taken were really touching with the messages they portrayed. None of it was pornographic at all and was very appropriate.
The 3 of us got topless with our undies on and decided to write the message on our bodies. The first message was written on Ayanda's tummy saying, "More than just my boobs" and she was covering her chest with her hands. Stacy had "More than just my ass" on her back and had her back to the camera and was looking over her shoulder and I had "More than just my vag" on my tummy, covering my chest too and having my little shorts unbuttoned. All 3 of us have, at some point in our time here and even in high school, felt as if certain types of men have not seen who the real person inside is and just regarded us as a face with an ass, boobs or vag. So this had a heavy meaning for us and I think the way in which we did it was effective.
Very excited to see the photos in the exhibition!!

At the moment though I have to run and do some work.. Not feeling too productive though.. HAVE TO FIND A LIFT TO THE BOYFRIEND THIS WEEKEND!! Eeek!! Speaking of the boyfriend:

You sink into my skin
Ever deeper with every breath.
This convenient, connecting slumber
Joins you and me.
I dare not move
Lest I shatter the fragile
Structure of this moment,
The most delicate,
Most powerful.
Your familiar face
Blushes and curves,
Talking, whispering, a mere mutter
Of my name.
My slumber has become yours
As I struggle fruitlessly, unwillingly
To break from my addiction.
Your warmth penetrates my skin
Saturating me in
The most fragile, most powerful
Comforts of addiction.
              -by me

Shweet. Cool.

Long time, no see!

So exams went by, and then holidays started and then those went by and now I'm back at university for term 3. Sheesh this year is moving way too fast!
Much like my previous lengthy break from blogging, I thought a million times "Oooh I should put that on my blog!", but, as before, I can remember none of it. Fail.
Recent thoughts though:

I have come to the stage of my life (or it might be just a phase) in which all I want to do is, (well only after travelling) find myself a nice job in a nice place and move into a really nice house or start building one with the man I marry and be able to count on having someone at home when I get there and then tell him how my day was and you know, just lead the simple life. It sounds so boring, but for me, that sounds like heaven because I know who it will be with and he alone embodies paradise for me. Anyway, I was telling someone this the other day and she basically told me that I was a disgrace to women and Feminism and for a second there I felt like I was, just a little bit. But then I realised that that's not what it's about. Feminism is about the power of choice. It isn't about women getting out of the home and destroying a stereotype, it's about giving women the choice to do that. If they want to stay at home and bring up children or if they want to go out and be powerful businesswomen or public figures should be their choice. It's all about being able to choose and the more people I told this, the weirder the looks I received became. Now I'm really just a bit baffled because I'm pretty frikken certain that forcing women out of the home does not amount to freedom. Hopefully it's just the noobs that I spoke to that have this view on Feminism and women.

AMAZING song that I rediscovered this vac though is It's All Your Fault by Pink. I love this chick. And if you merely read the words, it won't be good enough. Download the song or something.

I conjure up the thought of being gone
But I'd probably even do that wrong
I try to think about which way
Would I be able to and would I be afraid

Cause oh I'm bleeding out inside
Oh I don't even mind (Yeah)

It's all your fault
You called me beautiful
You turned me out
And now I can't turn back
I hold my breath
Because you were perfect
But I'm running out of air
And it's not fair

Da da dada da dada da
Da dadadadadada da dadadadadada

I'm trying to figure out what else to say
To make you turn around and come back this way

I feel like we could be really awesome together
So make up your mind cause it's now or never (oh)

It's all your fault
You called me beautiful
You turned me out
And now I can't turn back
I hold my breath
Because you were perfect
But I'm running out of air
And it's not fair

I would never pull the trigger
But I've cried wolf a thousand times
I wish you could
Feel as bad as I do
I have lost my mind

It's all your fault
You called me beautiful
You turned me out
And now I can't turn back
I hold my breath

Because you were perfect
But I'm running out of air

And it's not fair

(Oh yeah
It's all your fault)

I hold my breath
Because you were perfect
But I'm running out of air
And it's not fair

Such an awesome song, beat, words and all.

So I do this thing, that if there's something on my mind, I write about it. Sometimes a poem comes out and sometimes random thoughts and stories come out. But then there are the things that I'm scared to write about in case I jinx it. And eventually I work up the guts to just do it. And falling in love is one of these times. And so I wrote about it after about 6 six months of being with the greatest guy to ever grace me with his presence.

Roll over,
Reach out my hand.
Touch your imaginary face.
You're there.
I see you.
I feel nothing.
Forever near me,
Forever beside me.
You are the one
Who I feel is
With me all the time,
All the places.
Never there,
But ever near.
My world,
Your world,
No dividing line,
No marked conclusion
To either or.
You are I
and I am you.

                                              -by me

Giving you the power to destroy me
Is what I was destined to do.
Your mystery eludes me,
Angry me, lover me, you and me.
Becoming myself with you,
What else could I be expected to do?
Your heart, my heart:
Darling, you must learn to share.
Taking is sharing,
Sharing is taking,
So take and share.
Trust - I know what you could do to me,
But you don't.
Trust, deceit?
My world on a silver platter
While sparks fly high above
Your head, my head,
On a silver platter.
Why don't you break it?
Why don't you destroy me?

                        -by me

Valleys, mountains
Canyons, hills, cliffs.
An adventure of
Wonder, celebration.
No dry, baron flatland
Can compete.
You mark my landscape
On your intrepid adventures;
discovering, uncovering and worshipping.
Adorning every new discovery
With you love, your heart, your eyes.
My landscape thrives for you
My mountains remain ever fast, evergreen
While you love remains everlasting.
Explore me, intrepid adventurer,
until familiarity becomes familiar.
                              -by me

So damn good to be so in love with such an amazing person.

Marise (a girl on my corridor) made my day today. I love the song Little Lion Man from Mumford and Sons and she had it as her status on Facebook, so I comment and say "Play it LOUD, I wanna hear it too!" About ten minutes later, I hear this little speaker right outside my half open door playing Little Lion Man. That pretty much made my day :).

Getting back here yesterday, I traversed around the res to say hello to everyone and later on that night Tiff came back and of course the dear sweet girl hadn't taken her calm down pills and she was hyper as ever!! But she gave me the prettiest earrings ever!! And Belgium chocolate in the shape of a cellphone. After I had devoured like 2 kgs of chocolate at Jarrod's sister's wedding. So my body is not very happy with me, especially after coming back to this shitty food we get.. Cotch face.

C'est la vie...

So i had a really good weekend at home. Nadine couldn't come in the end but I enjoyed it none the less. Had my mom with me the whole time and had the best cooking in the world, which made me the happiest person alive!

Got back on Sunday afternoon. Later that night at 11:30, our warden (Sandra) starts knocking on everyone's doors telling us that there is an emergency meeting in the common room. The hall warden (Dr Gambiza) is here and he wants to give us some news. Now you can imagine how peeved we all were at being woken up or having our studying interrupted at 11:30 on a Sunday night. What could be this important, really?? So we get to the common room and everyone is speculating as to why we were there. All the sub-wardens and Sandra had to stand there and listen to us speculate and laugh while they knew what was going on. The Dr arrived and told us he had bad news. I will never forget what he said. "One of us has been killed." He said "Anja" but nobody knew who that was because she never called herself that. When he said her surname we all knew it was the beautiful, sweet, amazing Ajaya (AJ). She stayed two doors down from me and everytime I walk out of my room now all I can see are flowers outside of her door.

She had gone to Port Alfred with her friends and had left as I arrived back from home. I walked in as she walked out and I still said goodbye to her and told her to have a great time and thought how brave she was to wear shorts 'cause it was still kinda cold. On the way back on Sunday night the bakkie they were in rolled because the driver tried to overtake on a road that should not even exist it's so bad. I get scared driving along that road in broad daylight with the most responsible of drivers. It's not a fun ride. And not a road anyone should be overtaking on. She didn't suffer though and although that sounds sick of me, it was one of the things that we were thinking about and were comforted to know that she didn't.

AJ never didn't have a smile on her face and I literally cannot recall seeing her face in a frown, ever. Not once in the short time that I knew her. You could be having the shittest day ever and just talking to her would cheer you up, even marginally, but generally exponentially. She was a ballroom dancer and did drama and had such amazing talent.

She was literally one of those people that could light up a room just by walking into it and smiling at everyone. When we heard the news we went to De Beers (our brother res) to break the news. It's amazing how amazing those guys are. We stood in their foyer talking for hours and we stood in a circle praying for AJ and her family. I remember thinking how lucky heaven was to have been given such a special angel that night.

I still can't believe she's gone, but everytime I walk out of my door I realise she is. Makes me want to tell all my loved ones how much I love them and cherish them and all the people I want to make peace with that I'm sorry or I don't care anymore if they're not sorry. I don't ever want to leave this earth with things unsaid.

This is gonna sound weird, but I've always had this thing, I don't know what to call it. A theory? That the shortest lives are the most brilliant. Everyone who I have known that has passed away far too soon have been amazing people that lived everyday until there was no more left in that day. Someone said to me on Sunday night, "The great die young" and it has some truth to it. It's as if all the greatness that could be achieved in an average lifetime has been squashed up and crammed into 20 years, making it even more great or awesome. If this isn't making any sense then I suppose it doesn't matter because it's making sense in my head.

We are having a candle vigil tonight for AJ at which there will be a book in which we can write a message about her, a memory, a poem, something for her family, anything we want and that book will go back home with her family, that way some part of her Rhodes family can go back with her and her family. And then tomorrow is her memorial service and we are going to release helium balloons into the sky with notes attached to them for AJ.

It's amazing how quickly the people in your res and dining hall become like your family. When I think about it, they literally do become that: your family away from home. I've only been here for half a year and I feel like that already. Wonder what the second years feel like by now.

Needless to say, I haven't been getting too much studying done, but I'm getting there. My first exam is English on Friday afternoon and then I have History on Saturday morning. Great stuff. Can't wait for Saturday afternoon!!! For some reason my hand is REALLY itchy so I'm going to stop typing now, but I shall be back soon.

And just in case anyone thought of forgetting: I love my boyfriend!!!!!!!!!

Home sweet home..

So I'm going home today!! Just for the weekend but I'm super excited nonetheless. I miss home like CRAZY and especially my mom. She's my bestest friend and my mommy all rolled into one. I know people think that you shouldn't be all buddy-buddy with your mom and you shouldn't exactly have your mom as your only friend but my mom is my most important friend for sure!!

Me and my mom on the night of my matric farewell

Anywho, home cooking, yay!! My mom is making beet stew for tonight!! My mouth is watering. Literally. The food we get here is really really below average and I've been sick twice from it. Actually if you count how long i was sick for it's like 5 times. Can not wait to have some real food for a change and not slop. Although some of the meals here are okay and we kinda look forward to them.

More great news, Nadine is coming tonight with her sister and another friend and we (the 4 of us) are sleeping in my room. Going to get interesting. Hehe. Haven't seen that child since like February and I think I might crush her when I see her! Going to be a goooood night :P.. Meh, this blogspot story really needs emoticons!!

Anyway I must go and pack and then pretend like I'm studying really hard!!
Oh, and today you must do the following people: listen to Adele's Somebody like you. Just do it. And then watch Pink's Perfect music video. 'Til the end. The end makes it just that special. I want that. And I think I have that. Or I at least have the promise of having that. Watch it on YouTube and make sure it's the legit version ie. the version uploaded by Pink's VEVO account. Kay? Got it? Good. Go.

Swot week...can you feel it??...it is here! -sigh-

What a great weekend!! Had such a good time in PE with my boyfriend and now I have to find a way to cope for 4 weeks without seeing him.. Think I shall be asking my friend who hasn't seen her boyfriend since FEBRUARY!!!! for advice. I do not know how she hasn't gone off of her rocker yet.

I drank way too much Red Bull on Saturday because they were giving them away at Jarrod's university at the box car race they were having. Bouncing off the walls second to none. And now I have a whole week of no lectures, no tutorials, nothing to do except study. All this free time we get given and they want me to study??? Why, oh, why am I being tortured like this.. DC (the file sharing program) is calling my name!! Just want to watch movies and enjoy this free time.. Hehe. So it's going to be interesting to see how i cope with this. Pretty sure I'll be fine, but I don't really trust myself. Haha, isn't that comforting???

Rhodes students are absolute tops at finding new ways to procrastinate and not study. Seemingly normal chores and things become tools of procrastination. Such as:

• doing your washing - great way to get a tiny bit of time out of studying to do something you "HAVE" to do.
• lunch and dinner in the dining hall - you can stop studying at 12 on the pretense that you're hungry, go to the dining hall and sit there until 1:30 or 2 drinking tea and chatting and generally just procrastinating
• cleaning your room - something we used to hate doing as kids, we know find joy in doing, especially in these tiny rooms. Your excuse could go something like this, "I just can't study in a room that's messy or has an unvacuumed floor or that stinks. But now that it's clean, I'll be able to st... Good God, look at how messy those shelves are!! They need to be repacked. I can't work like this!!"
• smoking - for those who smoke, this is a GREAT tool. We can't smoke in our rooms or on the balcony so we have to sit on the lawn in front of the res if we want to smoke. This results in sitting chatting outside and having like 3 cigarettes before you start feeling really guilty and go back inside to study but instead you land up on
• FACEBOOK!! - worst.tool.of.procrastination.ever.

So now that I've procrastinated for the past half hour or so, I am going to go and study! But first I must shower. and do my washing.. Hmm and I'm hungry ;)

Rain. Cold. Sick.

I HATE BEING SICK!!

I'm a winter person and I love the cold but my tonsils are the size of golf balls and I feel like I'm swallowing shrapnel. Every time I need to swallow I tilt my head back and hope that going "Gggghhhuuuurrrrchhha" will magically make the spit go down. Sorry, that's gross, but I'm desperate and now I've got a headache. And I'm supposed to be going to PE to my boyfriend this weekend (if my lift pulls through) and I don't want to be sick!!!!

AAAAAAHHHH!! Thank god I have Sarika. My neighbour over the road (corridor). She is going to town today and is gonna buy me something for my throat :D!!! I love that kid right now. And now I have to go and mission around in this weather too with 2 large lumps in my throat. Joy.

Yesterday I decided to take a "personal afternoon" meaning I skipped 2 (unimportant) lectures and stayed in res after I had come up for lunch. I must've been in res for 15 minutes and the power goes out. While I'm trying to pee. So my plans to finish up on my tutorial work and then watch movies for the whole afternoon went to pot. I slept. From 14:30 until 17:30. The power came back on during that time abut then it went back off after ten minutes. So I woke up and we went to dinner and while we are sitting in the dining hall eating supper, the power goes out. Now one of 3 things can happen in a pitch dark dining hall full of students while it's PISSING with rain outside.

1. Everyone would start stealing food and condiments.
2. We would all just be so unimpressed by the afternoon's shenanigans that we would leave and order Steers.
3. People would start throwing food around.

If you guessed the second one, you'd be wrong. If you guessed only the first or the third you'd be wrong because they started doing both 1 and 3. I got a piece of potato bake flung into my face and about 5 peas to the head, my friend had chocolate mousse in his juice (yes, students were wasting the pudding that we get once a week that you would think is gold when we see it) and my other friend had a pea in his mousse. I would hate to have seen the hall when the lights came back on. All the butter would've been missing and there would be food EVERYWHERE!! So we got back to res and decided that there was nothing we could do there seeing as even the emergency lights weren't working. So 5 of us went out for drinks. As we left the power came on and off about 5 times alternating with the emergency lights. We went to the only bar in town with a generator and power and had a drink there. Being the only customers there that were sober and under 30, we decided to leave ASAP and went to the Rat and Parrot (another watering hole in town) and they had the whole candlelight effort going on. Was really nice and we had another drink there. The power eventually came back on and so we came home because we had work to do.

The second and third years were telling us stories about how they generally have so many power cuts in weather like this during exams that they sometimes end up sitting in the corridors studying under the emergency lights (if they are wowking) with blankets and stuff. Hard times hey.

All in all, yesterday was a complete write off of a day and I feel like donkey's balls right now. Going to finish tying my work and then crash again until lunch.

Something to look at...

*my blog does a spin and curtsies, showing off its new dress*

You like, yes?

I was browsing arb art sites earlier and Deviant Art always comes up. I have always used this site for art projects and the like and I think it's really cool. You can find everything from crafts to photos to fine art paintings and computer generated art there. Found some cool stuff there, but I'm not going to post all of it tonight. Just one relevant one if you are ever left wondering about the title of my blog:

I think that it is so true. If we can't appreciate the little things, I think we would all be positively insane by now. The world is filled with depressing things and if you don't know how to see the silver lining or the small beauties that are never too far to find, then you are going to be a very sad person.

The small things will become the big things once you realise that they make you happy.

Random pics I've had on my mind lately...

been missing my roxy pups..love this photo of her <3

meeting the most awesome band EVER
and having them sign my tummy.
amazing!one of the small things i will always
cherish.SUCH AN AWESOME BAND!!
Prime Circle baby..

this is what i do when i should be studying. deal.

Make of it what you will. I think it's perfectly beautiful.

"This is love, she thought, isn't it? When you notice someone's absemce and hate that absence more than anything? More, even, than you love his presence?"                                                                              {Jonathan Safran Foer}



Have a slight obsession with hands...so pretty.



Dreams, storms and walks along the beach..

What a weekend :)
Had such a great time with my boyfriend and his family in East London and haven't touched a book or a pc this whole weekend and as I type now, my fingers are like WTF are you doing woman???!!!
Was so nice to get away from res for a change and have a bit of "home-time". It's not at my home but it's at a home none the less.
That's what I've discovered is really valuable is that time away from res and the whole set up is really good for me. Not that I hate res, just that I do get chlostrophobic here sometimes.

We had a beautiful view of the sea and woke up to the smell of it in the air. I missed that. I had THEE best milkshakes in THEE world!! If any of you ever go to East London, find Friesland. Double thick chocolate malt (I think). Do it. You will not regret and it's worth the calories or whatever it is you worry about.

I love the rain \m/
We left Grahamstown late on Friday night and ended up driving through a HUGE storm. The rain was beautiful and I haven't felt that safe in a car in a storm before. Don't know why, but I'm going to say it's because I feel safe whenever I'm with Jarrod in whatever circumstances because that's what I like to think  xD  :P

Walking along the boardwalk at the beach today, I was so at peace, I felt like anything in the world could happen right then and it wouldn't matter. Was so nice to just dawdle with my hand in the love of my life's hand.

Random tangent: People think that saying the "love of my life" is very pretentious and is stupid because we have so much of our lives left and we're so young and we should enjoy ourselves. Well. I'm young and I still enjoy my life in all fields and don't think that having an amazing guy in my life is going to make me stop enjoying it. In fact, I'll enjoy it more, because if you're not enjoying yourself then you should not be in a relationship in the first place. He is it. If you don't like it then that's a pity. I know he's all there is and will be from now on and that's all that matters.

Random not, I know, but it cheeses me off when I hear, "How can you be so narrow-minded and naive?? You're so lovey-dovey, it's not healthy." Bully-bully-bullshit. It's unhelathy to hate on someone else's happiness.

The sound of the waves, rain on your windscreen, chocolate milkshakes, the sand between your toes, his sleeping head resting in your lap.
The little things are the only things that should count because thay are the things that will make you smile, and a smile can always be the source of your joy.

Clouds in the sky, but that's okay.
Clouds in the sky, been there all day.
Stars in your eyes, been there always.
My heart with yours, not just a phase.
All the world might never know,
Might never hear,
But I don't care.
Its you, my dear.
The clouds might burst
And shed their sadness,
The world
Won't know
My secret
Of the stars
In your eyes,
My love.    -by me

                                                                                         

First Dance..

So I'm a girl and as a girl, I am programmed to dream about my wedding. That's how it is. And this is the song I want to have my first dance to although a medley might be in order cause I have far too many favourites for my own health.

Everything by Lifehouse. Find this song. Now. That is all.


Find Me Here
Speak To Me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That's leading me
To the place where I find peace again.

You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose...you're everything.

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall.
You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Cause you're all I want, You're all I need
You're everything,everything
You're all I want your all I need
You're everything, everything.
You're all I want you're all I need.
You're everything, everything
You're all I want you're all I need, you're everything, everything.

And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?



So cute, right? :D






















That one is for you my love (heart)

Heeellooo............. O.o

So my amazing boyfriend reminded me that I have a blog!!
Hehe, what would I do without him, really?
Well, Its been a while and everything that I kept thinking, "I should put this on my blog" is no longer relevant to me or my life. Not much has happened since the holidays. I only got to spend 5 days at home and the other 5 days i spent in Port Elizabeth with the man of my life so I was still feeling a bit icky about missing home. Also, never let anybody have any kind of hold over your relationship unless they are directly involved. Don't do it. It is not worth all the stress. That is all.
The Easter break was awesome because with all the public holidays I managed to get 6 whole days off (ok, so i bunked 2) at home and got to spend some proper time with my family.

So, today I read my friends Facebook status and Nicky, if you ever read this, thanks dude ;).
It goes like this:

When you walk by a group of quote-unquote normal people you chuckle to yourself, patting yourself on the back as you scoff. It's the same superiority complex shared by the high school jocks who made your life a living hell, makes you a slave to the competitive capitalist dogma you spend every moment of your waking life BITCHING about!

Well that got my mind going. How true is this!! I am going to put myself into a group now for mere practical purposes, not because I am deeming myself part of this group. Us "different" people think we are so above the normal lot of people. How narrow-minded that is. We pity the people who picked on us in high school because we were just slightly different to what they were used to and thought that they have no right to think that they are above us and now that we are in a neutral environment where nobody cares what you do and how you do it, we think the exact same way as said jock did in high school; I am better than you and therefore have a reason to look down upon you. Isn't that what we tried to be rid of in high school? Isn't this the exact system we so gallantly fought against? I say why think yourself above anybody else? Why even bother with judging somebody on how they choose to live? Don't we have better things to do?

The world works because of the different people in it and it would just become a monotonous, dreary, malfunctioning blah of a planet if we worked that way. Thank God we don't!! Let them be gay, let them be Lesbian, let them walk barefoot in a kaftan to lectures, let them be "Like, OMG, I mean how could she even like...OMG I can't even explain it..OMG, like seriously", let them wear black and have a huge afro, let them wear shirts that promote one thing or demote another. Who gave you the right to say that they couldn't or that it's wrong that they do? Yes, you are entitled to your own opinion, but others are not entitled to the judgement they receive because of you opinion. Not on, bru.

Thanks for reminding of the existence of my blog babes.. (I think you are the only one reading this)

Sunshine and slang..

My room never sees the sun. I have a lovely view of a brick wall and the sun never sees my window. As much of a winter person as I am, rooms that are gloomy ALL the time make me gloomy too. I miss being able to lay on my bed in the warm rays of the sun. I'd give anything to switch to the opposite side of res. Would be amazing.

I'm not having a very happy day by the way, in case you haven't noticed. I decided to have a little snooze before lunch (I was bunking my journalism lecture - they are soooo boring!!). So about 30 minutes before I actually have to wake up, i had a repeat performance of yesterday. Someone decides to SCREAM, not just call loudly, but literally shout for her friend down my corridor. And when she doesn't get an answer, what do you think she does?? Yes, she does it again, and louder. The hairs on the back of my neck were sparking, I swear!! Sure, it's not quiet time, but flip, screaming is not inducive to happy people!! Hellloooooooo.. So anyway, that wasn't cool. Instant bad mood. I'm about to go and check my Psychology marks for my first test so that should be interesting. Very nervous!! First university test results.

I'm sick again. There was a bug trapped between my curtain and the window last night when i went to bed. So, I left my window open so that it could free itself anytime it felt like it. Pity it was cold outside and I breathed in cold air all night. Hate having the sniffles!! Had them for like 3 weeks and they finally went away and then that prehistoric insect looking bug thing went and messed things up. Joy.

Ok, what I do when i blog is I sometimes start a post and then have to run so i save it and come back to it later. Which is what I've done today, having to go to a history lecture and all. My mood has improved!! Very happy to announce this. An sms from my boyfriend and an 80% for my first test made me smile!! And of course my earphones plugged into my ears. Those helped. Serious fluctuation of emotions and moods today!! Think I have settled on this one though. Oh, and I solved the problem of no sunshine: I found my old necklace with a sun pendant. Wearing it = constant sunshine =)

So, the Grahamstown slang, as promised.

You have to be careful of your word choice here because there are a few words that mean more than what we are used to. Observe:

• Naps: not considered as the exercise i performed before lunch. Naps at Rhodes refer to something more uh, devious??..sinister??..i really don't want to say sexual although that's what it is. Ah!! Journalistic skill, come on. It's sexual. It means that you are going to some body's res to have a little booty call. We have afternoon naps, morning naps and then just plain anytime naps. I suppose it's a nice euphemism for "the nasty" isn't it??
• Lunge:Ah, to lunge. Not to jump quickly or move in a decisive manner, noooo. Nothing like that, although almost the same. Same same, just different ;). Ok, so, people say "I pulled in to kiss her/him/it!" We say "I lunged him/her/it!" Not necessarily a bad word, but you don't wanna be lunged by that tall creepy guy who tried to get with EVERYONE and succeeded with NO ONE at Friars on Saturday night. The guy you've been eyeing for weeks lunging you is, however, a very good thing!
• Mare: To drink. To party. To get sloshed. To kuier, pola, puza, celebrate. You understand. This happens on Cougar Mondays(will discuss this in a minute), Tipsy/2 for 1 Tuesdays, Wacky Wednesdays, Thirsty Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays. Ample opportunity to mare. Also,
• get mared: to get drunk.
  (good god we don't sound like we are a university with very high moral values in its students, do we??)
• Seal Clubbing: the act of hunting first years in order to have naps or lunge them. Mostly a male sport. We will get to the females now.
• Cougar Monday: House of Pirates (a local watering hole) has Cougar Mondays. Its the ladies night. And we (not me) take advantage of this. We are allowed to pick on those yummy school boys or (for the non-first year girls) those naive first years.
• BP run: missioning down to BP (petrol station/cafe) to stock up on neccessary items. Usually food.
• Mission: to go somewhere. To depart from something towards another thing. "Let's mission down the hill to Steers."

Right now though I have to mission to supper as my tummy is not happy with its current empty situation. I know I'll think of more slang as soon as i hit "Post" so expect another tutorial!!

Ciao =)